Member-only story
The Simple Actor’s Trick That Will Increase Your Charisma
I’ve talked since 2007 about techniques, neuroscience, and rhetorical devices designed to make you the best communicator you can be. In the end, though, I never forget — and you should never forget — that it comes down to passion. You’ve got to show up and be present in order to reach people through communication, and that takes passion. Otherwise, don’t bother.
Passion is both authentic and charismatic.
We don’t fully trust people until we’ve seen them get emotional — angry, sad, ecstatic — because these moments allow us to take the measure of their values.
What gets them angry, sad, or ecstatic? That’s how we size them up. If we see someone giving a tongue-lashing to a sales clerk because the store is out of an item, we make one kind of judgment about that person. If we see someone else standing up to a bully, we make another kind of judgment.
Sincerity of emotion shows up in nonverbal conversation through, perhaps surprisingly, stillness and openness. While the strong passions — anger, joy, excitement of various kinds — can all be signaled with energetic body movements, sometimes extreme stillness can be just as effective. Think of it like the voice: the point is to establish a baseline and then vary that to exhibit the emotions.